" If"

Occasionally,
It takes another to point out something you don't see.
Occasionally,
It takes another to instill hope back in your eyes.
Occasionally,
It takes another to give you the courage to do something.

But sometimes,
You don't want to see.
Sometimes
You don't want to hope.
Sometimes,
You don't want the courage.

Ultimately it just takes "ME" to make a change.
And "IF" is the challenge.
I'm getting there.
Despite the overflowing "What If's"
I'm getting there.
=)

Eagle Eye Cherry - Save Tonight ish awesome!

More Than 2?

Life's always about choices,
It's either this or that,
But really are there only 2 choices?
I wonder,
If you try to make a 3rd option,
Would it be worth it?
Or would you just simply get pushed back into the original 2 options?
Is it better?
Well who's to say?
Me?
I'm neither on the 1st path nor the 2nd,
Guess i'm making a 3rd path then.
=)

K pop?

It's freaking 12AM and you have a test in 2 days time, what do you do? YOU WATCH K POP WITH YOUR BROTHER FOR ONE AND A HALF HOURS!!! Cause i'm just awesome like that =D
Till i come back with something more worth reading. Goodnight?

Oh OH on a side note i finally got me mom to give a thumbs up to a dude outfit for a party!!! AWEZOUUMMMEEEE!!!!! yeah! take that white shirt, vest, pants and converse F YEAH!!! only thing i can't get is a spiked up mohawk fish...

The yearnings returned but much controlled
*pats own head* i ish proud of meself. XD

Funny Events.

As i've said before, the turn out of events are indeed humorous. It's like a dream or more of a blast from the past but whatever it is, it is and will unmistakeably be the highlight of my day. It doesn't work the same way as it used to but it still trots along the same lines. Thinking about it makes me laugh each time, is this wrong? Well i guess there are times where for just those moments, you push reason and rationality aside and enjoy what's set out in front of you. Let the moment happen and although reality is just around the corner it's better to have enjoyed the moment than to have not had it at all. Let the thinking come later, as it always does. After all i did today just tell someone to not let an opportunity slip by, so why should i? Not opportunities for something more but just for the sake of memories. Tonight the world that i turned gray seemed to have been splashed with the old vibrant colors that make me feel new. And i am happy =)

Guts

Had to find a picture of guts that wasn't too disturbing =D

You know, i think i used to have bigger guts. I used to do the corniest things just to talk to someone i really wanted to talk to. Ohhhh trust me, i was super daring once. I'm not gonna say what i did.. cause...well.... then i can't re-use it!! TEEHEE! But yeah, things were easier back then when i never really considered the consequence of my actions, but then again, why do i keep holding myself back now? I think the past year has really really scarred me to the extent that i've literally made the "I won't make a move until you make a move" line my freaking motto. Gosh! This is bad cause it brought about another debate in my head. I say i'm not gonna make the first move, fine. But what happens when the other person is thinking the same way? Then you end up not talking cause you expect the other person to be the first to start a conversation and it becomes so awkward cause you'll have one of those, "you start, no you start, no you start" moments. But the problem is.....THIS ARGUEMENT WILL BE HELD IN YOUR MINDS AND NOT OUT LOUD! Then the worst part of it all is that you'll start having these depressing thoughts going through your head like "Crap, this person doesn't care" or "I mean nothing to them" and it goes on and on and it develops into an insane bottled up emotion that leads you to JUMP OFF THE LEDGE! no...no... ok that was too much but you get what i mean right? Where'd all my guts go? I really need it back cause i'm not only doing it to certain people i'm applying that motto to everyone! Do you know how bad that is? I'm isolating myself from people again. Wonder if it's cause college is ending and i just wanna break off from the people i once knew. I really need to stop that, and i'm working on it i guess? I need my guts back ASAP or i shall resort to EATING GUTS!!!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHA

I ZOMBIE I OMNOMNOM YOUR GUTS!!!!!

It's OK Now.

Looks like everything turned out fine.
I'm relieved.
Even if i couldn't help.

My Heart.

Heart of a Realist.

My Heart skips a beat when i see you,
My Heart still longs to talk to you,
My Heart wants to reach out to yours,
  Yes, I still like you.
My Heart feels light to know you're alright,
My Heart is grabbed by panic to know you're not,
  Of course I still care for you.
My Heart does not & will not crumble as it did,
At least i hope it won't.
I'm building a heart for a Realist,
One that refuses to hope,
And i'm getting there.

Just one thing though,
Can i still hope to be your friend?
My Heart would like that very much.
For at least then,
I can have peace at mind knowing you're happy,
Or that i can help relieve you of stress.
Yes,
Yes,
My Heart would love that very much indeed.

P.S - Yes i am fully aware the picture i used is some heart with a bypass or something like that...IT MEANS NOTHING!!!!  I just wanted a nicely drawn heart really quick *COUGHlazytolookforniceronesCOUGH* Yeah..... I KNOW WHAT I'M DOING!!!! Pfft!

Faces XD

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand once again i ish schtupeed. Ah well, least i gave a hootery right? Strangely, yes strangely, it....doesn't feel bad at all hahahahaha. I don't have the "wait by the phone with the forever alone face" syndrome anymore hahahahhaha. Oh don't gimme that look, it happens when you like a person alright? Anyway, I mean i can face the "Are you alright?" question much more calmly now, not that i won't spew everything out, but i handle it a lil better emotionally. No more sulking for the rest of the night and the days to follow. Hmmm must be the Rocky XD And yes, it's 3AM and i'm eating Rocky, you mad bro? *Troll face* (I can actually do a troll face...i can do a lot of faces actually as shown below).

Yes this is me =D

Pretty good FU face don't you think? hahahahahaaha

Breaking "Never"

I know i shouldn't,
Not anymore,
Not again.
Never was the word i chose,
However...
I am somehow compelled to care.
The words are typed up,
All i have to do,
Is go against my stand,
And send.
And i shall.

Twirling Colors.

There's something different in the way you speak,
A lighter tone to it,
A brighter sense to it,
Makes me smile to know it's alright,
Even if you still take my breath away.
I am an explosion of colors,
Twirling.