72

I wonder

In 10 years, 30 years, 50 years,

Will I ever stop wanting you

71

I'm being selfish,

I want to scream,

And have eyes that don't belong to me,

Notice me,

See me,

Even for a second

70

What are these tears worth?

They can't save you,

They can't reach you,

And yet,

I cry,

Because you're hurting,

Always

69

If I told you I was unhappy,

Would you steal me away from the life I chose?

You wouldn't,

I know.

But foolish hope remains.

68

I think you'll always have a piece of my heart,

Be it for friendship or for love,

This part, 

Will always belong to you

67

The word,

Hurts me,

I joke about it,

But it still stings.

66

Stop.

You feel it don't you?

The strain,

The pull on your heartstrings,

It's so easy,

That's what makes it hard.

Stop,

Before it all rushes out.

65

Foolish memories,
We weren't dates and yet I had gone with you,
It didn't mean anything then,
Still doesn't now,
But what times we've let go,
Never knowing what would've been,
Had we held on.
01.10.19

64

The same familiar scene,
Laughing,
Mocking,
Teasing,
Baiting,
Goading,
Nostalgic and thrilling.
And then it hits me,
What this is,
The outstretched claws of a lonesome creature,
The howl for attention,
The frantic search for some semblance of warmth.
And I,
The safety net,
The everburning hearth,
Lay bare for the taking.
Same patterns,
Again and again.
29.06.19

63

I'm perfectly aware,
That what he seeks,
Is not me,
Nor my presence,
It is the idea,
Of someone,
To not be alone,
Scared,
And lost.
I can but give comfort,
Without having his waves,
Pull me deeper.
28.06.19

62

It doesn't matter,
But why am I torn?
Why does it scare me that you will leave in the end?
Wanting you to be happy
Is the most I can do
Even if
Once again
It rips my heart to shreds

61- Just talk

Today has been tears and tears,
But I feel better,
Talking to you,
I'm glad you're moving on.
I'm just happy we're talking again.

60

Stop making excuses and just tell me you never want to talk to me again.
That'd be so much easier,
Than having me watch you drift away.

59

Part of me still thinks of you,
Where you are,
And what you're doing.
Can't say you do the same,
Because "stupidly busy"
With work, family errands, events,
Are just another way,
Of saying,
I don't have time to think of you.
And that's as good as saying,
"I don't care about you"

58

"What about him",
I wonder what my father thinks of you,
He somehow or rather always brings it back to you,
He knows how much you mean, meant,
mean to me,
He also knows why we can't be,
I wonder why he still asks me about you,
I still wonder.

57

I want you to stop.
Stop calling me Nora,
Stop liking my insta posts,
Stop pretending like you're part of my life,
Stop acting like you care,
Stop saying that you're busy when you're really just avoiding,
Stop,
Just stop.

56

I am the queen of waiting,
Time doesn't change shit,
If one doesn't wanna change,
Nothing will.

55

"I miss you holding me. I need you."
One line from a story.
That's all it takes,
And I'm missing you.
You'll ask why don't we,
And I know,
I know I won't go to you again,
Cause I can't trust that you won't hurt me again,
Touching me,
But never wanting to keep me.

54

"Thanks"
But we both know I won't take your offer,
We're too far gone for that.

53

Tears well up in place,
Of "I miss you".