Study, Study, Study.

Things we wished we did earlier,
Deeds needed to be done,
Work that could have been completed,
Information we could have accumulated.

Am I the only one who wished I could turn back time just so that I would have studied when I had all the time in the world?
Cramping 14 weeks of 6 subjects is definitely insane shit right there. But I never do learn.
Stress..... Need a tub of ice cream to fall from the sky sometime soon. D=

Quicky.

Tests and shit. Must study and not Tumblr.....

I've Changed?

Marking points of change,

Really we can never really see how we change unless it's a huge difference,

Living with someone everyday,

You don't see how they've changed,

Try seeing them once a year,

You'll notice so much more.

Sometimes,

You don't notice you yourself have changed,

For better or for worse,

It takes some feedback to find out.

"I'm same old me but different"

I can't wrap my head around the idea,

But I guess if it's not for the worse,

I'll keep doing what I'm doing,

Even I have no idea what it is exactly I'm doing.

=)

Whirlwind.

When your world is a whirlwind,

And your life is a path of wreckage,

Remember who you are.

When you can't see where you're headed,

And want to self destruct,

Remember who you are.

When you're alone and broken,

And no one is there to pick you up,

Remember who you are.

We are the heart of the storm,

We are strength,

We are rage,

We are invincible,

We are fear,

We are love.

Never forget what makes us stand tall,

Family?

Friends?

Society?

The government?

School?

They do not.

Look in the mirror.

We do.

We create the storm,

And we will not be stopped.

Stupid Reminiscing.

Why do you do this to yourself Jane? It was all good but nooooo you just had to look for that video didn't cha? Stupid bit......

The past reminds us why we are what we are today and it tells us to learn from our mistakes. I don't think I'll ever learn. Because I always seek out that nostalgic feeling that started it all.

P.s - I'll rewind those few seconds as many times as I want, thank you very much!

Never Thought, Never Knew.

I never thought I would tell you,
Never thought I had the guts,
Never thought you would ask,
Never thought you wouldn't judge me,
Never thought it would come to this.

I never knew it was so easy yet so hard,
Never knew it wouldn't be awkward,
Never knew I would admit to everything,
Never knew I would say so much.
Never knew I needed this.

Things we don't think of, things we don't know.
Sometimes, it's not so bad to find out.

P.s - I know I really shouldn't but I wonder if you wonder about what would have been.

Theme song for the night :

The Best-Worst Day Ever (for now).

That awkward moment when some guy working in a restaurant hits on you. Oh god...... really, really like no kidding.....WHY????

In short my day = Suicide talk + Sathya + mee with milkshake + VOMIT + getting hit on.

(Not bad?)

So basically mom's been in Indonesia for the past 1 week, leaving me with UNLIMITED WIFI USAGE AND FREEDOM!!!!!! *magical music* Well it doesn't really make that much difference if she's not here anyway cause my dad's around but like, life's less stressful without her popping out from somewhere reminding me I'm not good enough. Okay.... that sounded bad, but we all have that one parent that pushes us right? If you do, you'll know what I mean.

Anyhoo..... Got up at 7a.m for a talk on depression and suicide. It was okay, pretty informative and oh I think I'm depressed hahahahahaha! Which is..... just wonderful but yeah whatever. Not suicidal ......YET!!! Hahahahaha but seriously I'm all good. =D

Went to Sathya's after the talk cause well the Clay Workshop got cancelled.... wait I mean postponed, which was superbly disappointing. Went to some cafe after picking up her car and like had this "ying yong" mee which came out to be twice the portion I thought it to be and a pretty darn big bottle of milkshake like juice called "sunrise". It was all great......at first. I mean me and Sathya practically laughed our heads off about being mean and oh so many events that's happened over the past month. *cough hotdog cough miss-texting cough* Ah gosh.... I think I've found someone who really matches my brain in IMU.

So towards the end, I couldn't finish the mee but I shoved most of it down leaving like 3 scoops left on the plate and then attempted to finish the over sized drink which had loads of milk in it. That's where the trouble began......You know that sweaty, cold, stomach grinding feeling you get when you know you're gonna hurl? Yeah..... It hit me, BAD. I felt the cold creeping up my neck and I told myself, "okay, okay, just breathe, you're not gonna hurl, let the food go down".....we talked some more and I find that I can't laugh anymore, and I need to burp, but if I did..... I would have hurled for sure. So I held it in and told Sathya I was gonna hurl very soon so we ciao-ed the place. But while walking back...... I was waaaaay to woozy to keep it in and I just know, I'M GONNA BLOW! So I was like "Sathya..... where can I vomit?" The sidewalk didn't have a freaking drain, they had at all covered up with concrete so fuck my life I had to hurl on it...... And true enough it ALL came out but surprisingly it didn't feel bad, not one bit. Unlike the usual burn you get, it was just like "PHEW! thank god that's out!" and I could actually burst out laughing after! Got back to Sathya's place without hurling so apparently it was all out and I just over ate. Well on a side note, I wasn't feeling too good from this morning so cut me some slack will you?

After that I slept and yeah went home and went to Murni. Typical outside eating spot when my mom's not around. So right.... everything is fine and dandy. Had great convos with my dad ranging from politics to the media to statistics to my uni assignment. Then I go pay the bill at the counter and like..... okay so before I get to the story, there's this guy who works in Murni that kinda well..... has been hitting on me? I mean I find him sweet and all....but......NO. hahhahahahahahaha He always like tosses smiles at me, tries to tend to our table as frequent as he can and always and I swear ALWAYS gives me discounts for my food. So no, I'm not full of myself dammit! And this time..... he wasn't at the counter but...... his friends were like "oh, yours is free today. *+ smiley face*" and I'm just like "what? *you've gotta be kidding me face + oh please don't be what I think it's gonna be*" and they just smile and said "our manager said it's on the house....... by the way, can he have your number?".

Ladies and gentlemen, I'm gonna be frank with you and admit that I act like a prick when people do shit like this to me. Okay maybe not a full out prick cause I don't throw a bitch fit and go all NOOOOOO all over the place. I just...... keep repeating "you're kidding right?" with that stupid face of mine. I FEEL AWKWARD OKAY!!!! And that's the only way I know how to react..... So I kept that up and I was like "can I say no?" Cause like I'm not giving some dude my number just cause he paid for my food! Jeez! This went on for what seemed to be like forever and they were like "Never mind, the food is on the house, next time...." *oh god...... kill me now..... metaphorically of course* My dad just laughs..... and I'm well flattered but like.....like......nooo...... nooooo...... nooooo...... I hope I never have to go back to that place..... sigh......  Today was the best-worst day ever!

Something that made me laugh at night =D