Indecision

I knew realistically we'd never be together,
But I cling on to any vestiges of what I think is companionship,
And stay
And stay
And stay
It's a push pull she said
Back and forth
Endlessly

"I don't think you're good for me"
I've always thought that
To learn that people can touch for the simple sake of touch without seeking the emotional comfort of eternity
I can't comprehend it
And yet that's what we are
I'm confusing love for what I can give to pretend to be enough
That love and lust can be separated simply because the other only wants one
Yet why can't I leave?
Because it's better to have than to not
The unsettling fact that there'll be nothing is more unsettling than having but only a little
And still I claim to know what I want
I need to walk away from this
Silently
But I can't, I wont